Of Profanity and Christianity

In the past 9-12 months or so, I've encountered a growing phenomeon amongst Christian people I come in contact with. An increasing number of them are incorporating profanity into their everyday language.

Before we go further, let me distinguish the difference between profanity and blasphemy. Profanity would be those words that fall into the general description words. For example, the s-word, the f-word, b!tch, damn, etc. Blasphemy is taking God's name in vain, and I have no tolerance for that speech.

Ok, it has been said to me on many occasion, "Hey, they're just words. They're not blasphemy and they describe accurately what I'm trying to communicate. So what's the problem?"

I'm not sure I have a problem with this line of reasoning. Most words in the list above are ones that certainly all adults have heard before and most of them use them from time to time if not all the time. I would just question whether or not there is a more civil, dignified way to express your thoughts. Use profanity at me, even to describe me, and you're not going to offend me because I don't think it qualifies as sin, but it would worry me that using this language in everyday speech would be overheard by children.

Also pointed out to me, "Hey, if I'm gonna say 'freakin' or 'shoot' isn't that the same thing as saying the actual word it represents and if so, why not just say the word I mean to say?"

Again, not sure I have any argument here, or any general problem with people using profanity. I'm just wondering if it is the best way to commuincate. I admit that there is sometimes a feeling of liberation and freedom that comes from saying certain profanity, knowing that it really isn't sinful, but I worry that in a fit of anger or frustration, they symbolize feelings that are sinful.

I guess the bottom line for me is that while I would never judge anyone for using profanity, I might wonder why they choose that particular adjective instead of one that is non-vulgar...thoughts? Comments??? C'mon dammit!!!

I feel like bowling

"Size eight-and-a-half," said the joyous KU football fan. "I'm going bowling!"

Congrats to Mark Mangino, who is now taking KU to a post-season bowl game for the 2nd time in 3 years...plus, we beat Missouri again this year...and K-State finished last in the Big 12 North for the second year in a row. I might actually force myself to leave Colorado to see this game.

MD

Wax off

Rest in peace, Mr. Miyagi...

Noriyuki "Pat" Morita

1922-2005

roll your eyes or scoff if you must, but the movie Pat is famous for, The Karate Kid, had a profound impact on my childhood. I remember it quite vividly. My mother dropped my brother and I off at Oak Park Mall to see it (it was the first time I had seen a movie without a parent) And from the outset, I was mezmerized. I got totally caught up in the movie like I never have before or since (except maybe Hoosiers or The Natural) It was the first time I was introduced to 'bad' people, ie. Johnny and Sensai. I was literally on the edge of my seat at the end wanting so badly for Daniel-san to triumph against such long odds and doing so righteously.

And when it comes to famous sayings from this movie, Mr. Miyagi owns them all...

"Man who catch fly with chopsticks accomplish anything"

"Must have balance"

"Bansai!!!"

and of course,

"Wax on, wax off"

Even though I've seen it probably 100 times, I'm watching it again...

Hooray Capitalism!

It's 6:22am, the day after Thanksgiving...a quick re-cap of my day's events so far

4:25am - Alarm awakens me in the middle of a dream about The Alamo...
4:33am - Andrew calls me to make sure I'm up and to pass the time...he's been at Best Buy in Denver since 4
4:40am - Arrive at Best Buy...approximatley 500 people are already in line, I take my place at the end of the DSW storefront, just before Whole Foods. Temp = 28F
4:43am - the socialists at Whole Foods rediscover the joys of supply and demand and start selling coffee and pastries to the people in line
5:00am - Best Buy opens...the line for entry has now doubled
5:02am - I reach the front door. I head straight for the computer section and somehow manage to secure an external hard drive then I mosey over to the software and pick up Nero CD, Norton Anti-Virus/Anti-Spam/Networks, and Magix mp3 maker.
5:13am - I find my place in the checkout line which was designed by the store to snake around the appliances...how anyone will manage to shop for appliances is beyond me...now the line is stacked up to the vacuum cleaner aisle
5:24 - Finally I have reached the checkout. The cashier scans my items, I pay then we both wait for what seems like an eternity as the machine spits out 15 different receipts/rebate forms.
5:27 - Exit Best Buy...inventory is as follows

One 160GB External Hard Drive $139.00 - $60 rebate = $79.00
One Norton Utilites Bundle $89.99 - $90.00 rebate = $-0.01
One Nero 7 CD Burner software $69.99 - $70.00 rebate = $-0.01
One Magix MP3 Maker $19.99 - $20.00 rebate = $-0.01

Now...on to Office Depot!

5:36am - I arrive at Office Depot, there are maybe 50 people in line
5:38am - Loud, obnoxious guy arrives in line behind me
5:45am - Poor verbal communicator employee emerges from the store to announce something about computers needing shipping...I wasn't listening much because I wasn't there to by a computer, but it was way too early to expect people to comprehend this guy
5:56am - Inexplicably, the line starts to move...I make my way to the CDRs and pick up 2 packs of 100 for $10 each, then I lugged an office chair, on sale for $35, up to one of the 3 registers they had open.
6:03am - Exited the store, carrying my new Chelsea fabric office chair (black) and my CDs
6:15am - I arrive home...all my neighbors are asleep and my newspaper hasn't arrived yet...I'll pay for this later I'm sure

A few random observations...
*You know how when you first start dating someone, and they're always dressed up nice and look their best and then the relationship progresses to the point where you see them first thing in the morning? With a few notable exceptions, this was like a giant 'what I look like when I roll out of bed and go' convention...not good, especially for those of us standing next to people who like to talk and forgot to brush their teeth on their way to 'saving' money.
*Standing outside in line at Best Buy, a Red Bull truck drives by...followed by about a dozen crazed people chasing it.
*I'm a big proponet of Capitalism, and I appreciate what these stores are trying to do by getting us to their store first on the biggest shopping day of the year, but it's starting to get out of hand. I mean 5 o'clock in the morning is awfully early and in a few years it's bound to be 4am and so on...and obviously people do it...I'm just curious to see where it will end...what's the threshold for getting a deal vs. little or no sleep
*I now have no fewer than 7 rebate forms to fill out and mail...those checks should start rolling in by St. Patricks Day I'm sure...

Happy Holida....I mean MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

MD

Take This

Everyone is telling what they're thankful for because it's Thanksgiving...while I'm thankful for a great many things, there are also those things that I've taken for granted and am no longer as thankful for as I should be. They are...

1. The high quality of Kansas Basketball. Every year I enjoy at least 20 victories by one of college basketball's most storied programs. It's become more than an expectation that they will play in the big dance. It's like St. Patrick's Day, you know it's coming every year.

2. The quality of non-network television. Man, I never saw this one coming and I'm starting to appreciate it more. I remember the days when tv shows on NBC, CBS and ABC were relatively good. Some still are, but most are very poor. This probably evolved over time but I just got rid of satellite tv and am just beginning to notice.

3. Public radio. Here in Colorado, we enjoy the music of a independently owned classical, public music station. They take no money from the govt. as all other public radio stations in the entire country (save 2 others) do. This, to me, is extremely admirable. Yet, I never give financially to keep them up and running despite the fact that it's constantly on in my car. I either need to put my money where my mouth is or take the station off of the three auto-presets in my car.

4. Hot water. Every day, I wake up to take a shower and every morning, there is steaming hot water ready to assist in my bodily cleansing. I'm going to start appreciating this much more.

5. The U.S. Military. This group of volunteers is the most noble group of individuals in the world today. There to ensure that my life, liberty and pursuit of happiness are protected. Giving me the priviledge to write and say anything I wish. Thank you troops. Thank you for what you do, how you do it and why you do it. America loves you dearly and is behind you.

Happy Thanksgiving!

MD

Mile 'High' Garage

Weather report...63 and sunny today...I swear I'm never leaving this state again except for maybe a bowl game...

I've purchased another home here in Colorado, one to fix up and resell or rent out...yesterday was the inspection and it was most interesting.

When I walked through the house before deciding to purchase it, I took note of the large, detached garage out back. I tried to enter the garage, but all doors were locked and my realtor had no key. SO, without looking in the garage, I made an offer on the property and it was accepted.

**IMPORTANT SIDE NOTE**

I work with my realtor to purchase properties that have become assets of the state through death or foreclosure. These properties come as is so in this case, anything that is left behind becomes mine. This can be good when they leave behind a waffle maker. This can be bad when...well, back to the garage.

The inspector for some reason had the key to the garage and allowed me initial access. I opened the door and was overwhelmed by an odor I'll describe as 'one I remember from college'
Inside this 21 x 15 garage were 3 couches, full carpet, several coffee tables and a beautiful Coors Light mirror. Among the other interesting features of my new garage, which backs to an alley, is that it comes complete with a peep hole. Just as you'd find in your front door to allow you to see who is there before opening it, my new garage has such a peeping device imbedded in the siding.

Now I know why I was able to get such a good price...but I'm starting to get worried about what we'll find in the storage shed.

Quality Control

So I just got back returning the Rug Doctor I rented from Albertson's, it worked, the carpets look much better.

When I first borrowed the Rug Doctor, the lady at the courtesy counter emphasized how important it was that I return it clean. This is not a problem for me as I am meticulously neat. On more than one occasion I have returned a tile saw to Home Depot to a 'it looks brand new' response.

So I spent 3 hours or so shampooing the carpets, laboriously lugging gallon after gallon of water+special soap formula to the Rug Doctor...I then spend the next 45 minutes super detailing this machine as if it were a '75 Stingray. I cleaned every square inch of that machine...I even stuck paper towels down into the deepest crevices to soak up any extra lingering moisture to ensure my Discover card wouldn't be slapped with a cleaning charge.

Well, I take it back and the guy behind the counter is on the phone. He sees that I'm returning a Rug Doctor, gives me a head nod and a palm down indicating I am to just leave it there...then he remembers I have to sign saying I returned it...so, without getting off the phone (it was clearly not a work conversation) he gets out my paperwork and has me sign. I'm free...but it hurt me, not that he didn't acknowledge how clean it was, but that he barely acknowledged I was there.

If this kind of thing were to happen at, say, Vagabond Records...heads would roll.

Dearest Alanis

Why? Why did you record a cover of "Crazy"? You're talented. You're accomplished. You're transcendent as a musical artist. WHY did you do this?

You're not Tiffany. You're even better than Gwen Stefani! I demand an explanation...

If you're going to cover this song, do it in concert and let people pass it around on bootleg mp3s on the internet...don't deliberately go into a studio and record it!

It's as if you needed another song for your latest album and some intern re-mixed the music track and you just came in and sang it...exactly like Seal.

If you want to cover something again, pick a B side cut that never made a ripple on the airwaves like some obscure but good Fine Young Cannibals tune, and make it your own.

Alanis, please help me overlook this...tell me you were depressed or on cold medication...anything to help repair the goddess image I have carried with me in my mind all these years...

I think I said too much just then...

Beer World News Update

In case you hadn't heard...

Miller Claims Bud Light Formula Different

Tuesday, November 15, 2005
MILWAUKEE - The latest fight in the U.S. beer battle is a matter of taste. Miller Brewing Co. says rival Anheuser-Busch has altered Bud Light in the past year to make it more bitter and bubbly, rolling out the claim about Bud Light in national television ads that began airing Friday. The company said data it has collected show Bud Light's bitterness and carbonation rose from last year.
Anheuser-Busch Cos. Inc. called Miller's claims "another marketing ploy" and complained to cable networks that the statements are false.
Now, 10 of 32 cable networks contracted to run the commercials have put them on hold while awaiting substantiation of the claims, said Pete Marino, a spokesman for Milwaukee-based Miller, a unit of SAB Miller PLC.
Several networks, including TBS, TNT and E!, have held the ads, while others such as CNN, CNN Headline News and Comedy Central continue to air them, Marino said Tuesday. Broadcast networks ABC, CBS, NBC and Fox were not targeted in the ad buys, he said.
"All we're saying that they're doing is that they changed Bud Light and that Miller Lite still has more taste," Marino said. "We need to be very diligent in protecting our taste claim."
Anheuser-Busch Cos. Inc. said Monday it has not altered its "winning formula." However, the company added, "our brewmasters are constantly making small adjustments to address seasonal changes in raw ingredients."
Bud Light remains the highest-selling light beer in the world, according to St. Louis-based Anheuser-Busch, which also controls nearly half the U.S. beer market.
"We saw negative advertising that included our product, and we were in the best position to explain to the networks that these claims are not true," Anheuser-Busch group vice president of brewing operations, Douglas Muhleman, said in a statement Tuesday.
The dispute is the latest chapter in a bitter skirmish for sales as Americans increasingly experiment with liquor-based drinks and more upscale microbrews and imports. As a result, beer sales have gone flat in the U.S. market.
In the first nine months of the year, Anheuser-Busch saw its share of shipments slip by 1.1 points to 48.7 percent, while Miller was flat at 18.2 percent, said Benj Steinman, publisher of trade newsletter Beer Marketer's Insights.
"Irrespective of who's right on whether the taste changed, it's a continuation of a campaign Miller has had for two years," Steinman said. Miller's attack in the light beer segment since 2003 helped turn around its flagship Miller Lite last year and steal market share from Anheuser-Busch for the first time in nearly three decades.
But the offensive has turned off some broadcasters.
Last December, CBS and NBC pulled three Miller ads that took aim at Bud Light and Budweiser, with CBS calling the ads "disparaging."
In April, the Treasury Department's Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau rejected Anheuser-Busch's complaints about Miller advertising, which said Miller Lite had "more taste and half the carbs of Bud Light."
A spokesman for Turner Broadcasting System, a subsidiary of Time Warner Inc., would not comment. A spokeswoman for E! Entertainment Television Inc. said the company does not comment on specific advertisers.
The latest commercials depict a court setting, where Miller Lite's taste is judged against a "changed Bud Light." One ad features rapper Flavor Flav as an expert witness.

The really sad part is...there are probably Bud Light drinkers out there who noticed and anytime Flavor Flav is involved it adds instant street cred

"Ya know, Earl. This Bud Light tastes a little less like horse urine and a little more like yeasty water"

Just in case anyone reading this needs an expert on say...Fat Tire, I'm available to start immediately

Things I Hate About Soccer

I love soccer. I love playing soccer and I love following soccer. I've played soccer many more years in my life than I have have not.
That said, as I, like many of you I'm sure, was watching the MLS Cup game on Sunday, I was struck suddenly with several things I despise about the sport I love to play.

1. Flopping
The Academy of Motion Pictures really should consider adding, "Best Acting As Though My Leg Has Been Severed With A Butter Knife Soccer Injury" as a category. Grown men. Seemingly intelligent men recoiling in pain after being challenged for a ball. Carrying on and on, rolling on the ground, milking it for way more than it's worth. The only time this becomes amusing is when the replays show that the hapless 'victim of senseless soccer violence' wasn't even touched. If these people were injured just half as bad as they pretend to be, mothers all over the world would ban their children from playing soccer. It would be the world's second most dangerous sport behind the luge (those people are insane)

2. Women
This is going to sound sexist, but I promise I have no disrespect for the female gender and freely admit that when it comes to sideline reporting of a sporting event, women and men are equals.
Here's my beef. In a sport where there is complete segregation AND complete competitive equality, why do we need to have a woman prowling the sidelines feeding us information over the airwaves. Women have professional soccer leagues all over the world (including the US). Women have their own World Cup. They compete at the Olympics. It is perhaps the one 'major' sport where women have comparable opportunities as men do.
SO, Brandi Chastain, I loved you for beating China in '99 and setting the women's movement back 10 years by ripping off your shirt after your winning penalty kick, but leave men's soccer alone. Tab Ramos, Alexi Lalas, anyone who is American, male and a retired soccer player should be doing your job as sideline reporter for the MLS Cup.
I don't feel this way about baseball, football, basketball, hockey...but soccer, golf...sports where there is, maybe not equality, but at least significant opportunity, let's keep it separate. **Again, let me emphasize that I respect women and the irreplaceable role they play in society...some of the most influential people in my life have been women**

3. The Wall
When a team lines up for a free kick near the opposing goal, the defense often forms a human wall, 10 feet away by rule, making it more difficult for the shooter to score. Good strategy, but if you've ever watched a wide angle shot of this taking place, you'll notice that the wall is anything but stationary. No, it is quite mobile, often creeping 2 or 3 feet closer to the ball by the time the kicker makes his strike. This is ridiculous. It's like the defense in football being allowed to creep over the line of scrimmage before the ball is snapped. Enforce the rules. Soccer does have one of the lowest, maybe THE lowest, player to official ratio in any major sport(3 officials for 22 players)...But c'mon. Draw a chalk line or something...it's crazy...just like

3a. Free Throws
When a ball is kicked out of bounds by a player on team A, a player on team B takes the ball and throws it in at the place it was kicked out. That's how the rule is written. In reality it reads this way...When a ball is kicked out of bounds by a player on team A, a player on team B takes the ball and throws it in after feigning a throw or two and scooting at least 10 yards closer to the opposing goal. It's just insane. Again, this would be akin to a golfer fetching a ball out of bounds and walking 10-20 yards closer to the hole before dropping or a pitcher in baseball taking two big steps toward the plate before throwing a pitch.

Well, I think that covers it for now...for the record, I'm really looking forward to next year's World Cup

Pre-Thanksgiving Five Random Things

1. It's 69 degrees and sunny...God, I love Colorado.

2. My son has started talking back to the TV, specifically Dora the Explorer. She'll ask the viewers to help her by saying 'estrellas' or something...here's how the 'conversation' goes...

Dora: Help Tico by saying 'abre' Say 'abre'
Son: NO!
Dora: Again! Say 'abre'
Son: NO, Dora!

This is beyond words funny...when he starts in with me, it will be a different story I'm sure.

3. At Village Inn having breakfast...my friend and I were talking for over an hour between waitress visits. I know this because we realized after 45 minutes that we didn't have the check and it took another 15 minutes to flag down another waitress to ask for our check. It's the first time I've left no tip in my entire life...

4. Work conditions: My new job has me working out of a garage temporarily...luckily, we've been having really warm weather. Hooray global warming! (just kidding of course, there's no such thing as global warming)

5. Once, just once this college basketball season, I would like to see KU win a game they're not supposed to win. This rarely happens only because they're favored to win most every game. Just one time, so I can be excited again because I'm still suffering from last year's early exit.

For the Record

Easy to imaging President Bush saying the following, but he didn't...

"If Saddam rejects peace, and we have to use force, our purpose is clear: We want to seriously diminish the threat posed by Iraq's weapons of mass destruction program." -- Bill Clinton, February 17th, 1998

"We must stop Saddam from ever again jeopardizing the stability and the security of his neighbors with weapons of mass destruction." -- Madeleine Albright, Clinton's secretary of state, February 1st, 1998

"He will use those weapons of mass destruction again as he has ten times since 1983." -- Sandy Berger, Clinton national security advisor, February 18th, 1998

"We urge you, after consulting with Congress and consistent with the US Constitution and laws, to take necessary actions, including, if appropriate, air and missile strikes on suspect Iraqi sites to respond effectively to the threat posed by Iraq's refusal to end its weapons of mass destruction programs." That from a letter to President Clinton signed by Senators Carl Levin, Tom Daschle, John Kerry, and others, October 9th, 1998

"Saddam Hussein has been engaged in the development of weapons of mass destruction technology, which is a threat to countries in the region, and he has made a mockery of the weapons inspection process." -- Nancy Pelosi, December 16th, 1998

"Hussein has chosen to spend his money on building weapons of mass destruction and palaces for his cronies." -- Madeleine Albright, Clinton's secretary of state, November 10th, 1999

"We begin with a common belief that Saddam Hussein is a tyrant and a threat to the peace and stability of the region. He has ignored the mandate of the United Nations, is building weapons of mass destruction and the means of delivering them." -- Senator Carl Levin (D-MI), September 19th, 2002

"We know that he has stored nuclear supplies, secret supplies of biological and chemical weapons throughout his country." -- Al Gore, September 23rd, 2002

"Iraq's search for weapons of mass destruction has proven impossible to deter, and we should assume that it will continue for as long as Saddam is in power." -- Al Gore, September 23rd, 2002

"We have known for many years that Saddam Hussein is seeking and developing weapons of mass destruction." -- Ted Kennedy, September 27th, 2002.

"The last UN weapons inspectors left Iraq in October of '98. We are confident that Saddam Hussein retains some stockpiles of chemical and biological weapons and that he has since embarked on a crash course to build up his chemical and biological warfare capabilities. Intelligence reports indicate that he is seeking nuclear weapons." -- Robert Byrd (D-WV) October 3rd, 2002.

"We are in possession of what I think to be compelling evidence that Saddam Hussein has and has had for a number of years a developing capacity for the production and storage of weapons of mass destruction." -- Senator Bob Graham, Democrat, Florida, December 2002

"In the four years since the inspectors left, intelligence reports show that Saddam Hussein has worked to rebuild his chemical and biological weapons stock. His missile delivery capability, his nuclear program. He has also given aid, comfort, and sanctuary to terrorists including Al-Qaeda members. It is clear, however, that if left unchecked, Saddam Hussein will continue to increase his capacity to wage biological and chemical warfare and will keep trying to develop nuclear weapons." -- Senator Hillary Clinton, October 10th of 2002

"I will be voting to give the president of the US the authority to use force if necessary to disarm Saddam because I believe that a deadly arsenal of weapons of mass destruction in his hands is a real and grave threat to our security." -- Senator John Kerry, October 9th, 2002

Carl Levin, Ted Kennedy, John Kerry, Al Gore, Bill Clinton, Madeleine Albright, Sandy Berger, Nancy Pelosi -- these are all the card-carrying leaders of the left's anti-war brigade today. "Bush lied about weapons of mass destruction! Intelligence was manipulated! We were tricked!" How do you explain your consistency on this issue for five years prior to Bush, three years prior to him even assuming office? And for the record, the WMD clause in the declaration of war that Congress approved was only one of 14 reasons listed in said declaration.

An Epiphany

Leave it to my favorite writer, Bill Simmons, to hit me across the face with a description of Theo Epstein's departure from the Red Sox that so mirrored my own feelings (on a much smaller scale of course) on my recent job loss/life crisis...

He writes:

"When you dream about doing something for a long time, and then it happens, it's never actually as good as you think it would be. There's almost a surreal letdown of sorts after the fact. And it's impossible to explain unless it's happened to you. For instance, ever since I was in college, I dreamed of having my own sports column and covering a Boston team when they won a championship. That's all I wanted. In the spring of 2001, ESPN found me. Nine months later, my beloved Patriots went to the Super Bowl and shocked the Rams in New Orleans. I wrote about it every day, and on the morning after they won, my column ran on the front page of this Web site. Greatest professional moment of my life, right?
Well, something weird happened. After that game, I couldn't stop thinking, "All right, what happens now? What do I do? How can I top my dream moment?"
And the thing is, you can't. The moment happens, it ends, you celebrate and feel good about yourself … and then it's on to the next day, and you have to figure out what the next challenge is, and deep down, you're wondering why you didn't enjoy that watershed moment more than you thought you would. I don't know Theo, I have never met him, and the experience of being the general manager of the first Red Sox championship in 86 years was roughly 100,000,000 times more profound and important than my experience in New Orleans. But the fact remains, after that Super Bowl column, I struggled writing this column for the next seven to eight months; eventually, I ended up moving to California to write for a fledgling late-night television show. That Super Bowl trip changed everything for me.
Did something similar happen to Theo after winning the World Series? Is this what happened to David Caruso when he said, "Screw it, I don't need 'NYPD Blue' anymore?" On a much, much larger scale, is this what happened to talents like Dave Chappelle, Eddie Murphy, Kurt Cobain, Michael Jordan and everyone else who either walked away from their alleged dream job or sabotaged it in their prime? Is that why the Peggy Lee song "Is that all there is?" rings especially true in moments like these?"

I started feeling 'that way' about my job and my life last year about this time. Asking questions like, 'what if I peak at 30?' and 'is this how I'm going to spend the next 30 years?'

Still in the same industry, still in the same life, I'm looking back at the bright accomplishment I had at my previous job and becoming ever more grateful that it's over. Now...I need a new dream...